新外研版必修一第5单元课文An Encounter with Nature里有一段文字,描写了黄石公园的美景和作者与熊邂逅的惊险场面,让人有身临其境的感受,适合学生背诵学习,并在读后续写中模仿应用。

Last spring in Yellowstone, I followed a path that took me through a dark forest. When I finally stepped out of the trees, the view was breathtaking. An eagle flew over the snow-capped mountains, which were reflected in the still lake below. While I was concentrating on photographing this amazing scene, I suddenly had a feeling that I was being watched. Slowly, and with the camera still held to my eyes, I turned...and froze. Only meters away from me was a bear. With water falling off its thick, brown hair, the bear stared back at me. Time stood still as the bear and I both waited to see who would move first. My legs started shaking. Somehow, I forced my finger to press the button. A second later, the bear turned and ran back into the forest. When I recovered from the shock, I looked at my camera. My most frightening but magical experience was now captured forever in a single image.

描写景物读后感的写作方法和步骤(读后续写素材积累)(1)

美文赏析:

1.Last spring in Yellowstone, I followed a path that took me through a dark forest.去年春天,在黄石公园,我沿着一条小路穿过一片黑暗的森林。

follow a path沿着一条小路 follow为熟词生义,沿着(道路、标志等),that引导的定语从句,that代替path在从句中作主语。

2.When I finally stepped out of the trees, the view was breathtaking. 我终于走出树林时,眼前的景色令人叹为观止。

breathtaking adj激动人心的,令人惊叹的;非常糟糕的,令人震惊的(值得学生模仿使用的高级词汇)

3.An eagle flew over the snow-capped mountains, which were reflected in the still lake below.当一只鹰飞过雪山,雪山倒映在下面平静的湖面上。

the snow-capped mountains雪山(非常形象的描述)

which引导的非限制性定语从句,reflect v倒映 still adj平静的

(你的眼前浮现出雄鹰飞过白雪皑皑的高山,雪山倒映在清澈平静的湖面上,及其优美的景色描写)

4.While I was concentrating on photographing this amazing scene, I suddenly had a feeling that I was being watched. 当我专注于拍摄这个惊人的场景时,我突然有一种被监视的感觉。

concentrate on集中精力于;全神贯注于,近义词有focus on,fix one's eyes/attention/mind on,be absorbed in,put one's mind to,put one's heart into等

this amazing scene惊人的场景

that引导定语从句,代替feeling,在从句中作主语,定语从句中的过去进行时非常适合用于场景描写,生动形象。

5.Slowly, and with the camera still held to my eyes, I turned...and froze.相机仍然对着我的眼睛,我慢慢地转过身来,呆住了。

with the camera still held to my eyes为with复合结构,在句中作状语,表达作者当时的动作,与后面的froze非常搭配。

turned 和froze两个动词精准描述了作者当时的动作和状态。(用两个或多个并列动词作谓语表达动作,有极强的表达力,画面感很强。)

6.Only meters away from me was a bear. 离我只有几米远的地方有一头熊。

本句为倒装句,强调Only meters away from me离我只有几米远的地方,更加凸显出当时情况的紧迫感,让读者的心也跟着悬了起来。

描写景物读后感的写作方法和步骤(读后续写素材积累)(2)

7.With water falling off its thick, brown hair, the bear stared back at me. 水从它浓密的棕色毛发上落下,熊回头盯着我。

With water falling off its thick为with复合结构做状语,stare at盯着看

with复合结构对熊的描写惟妙惟肖,读者好像能看到晶莹的水珠从熊的浓密的毛发上低落下来,太形象了。

8.Time stood still as the bear and I both waited to see who would move first.时间静止了,我和熊都在等着看谁先行动。

still adv静止不动

非常好的心理描写,这种静态中的心里描写更能突出当时作者心中的恐惧,让读者心里为他捏了一把汗。

9.My legs started shaking. Somehow, I forced my finger to press the button. 我的腿开始发抖。不知怎的,我强迫我的手指按下按钮。

从心里的恐惧到身体的发抖,让读者真正感受到了作者当时所处的危险情形。

force sb to do sth强迫某人做某事

10.When I recovered from the shock, I looked at my camera. My most frightening but magical experience was now captured forever in a single image.当我从震惊中恢复过来时,我看了看我的相机。我最可怕但又神奇的经历现在被永远地记录在一张照片里。

shock n震惊,吃惊(吃惊的程度很深,震惊)用在此处非常恰当。

英文解释:a strong feeling of surprise as a result of sth happening, especially sth unpleasant;

frightening but magical experience可怕但又神奇的经历(太贴切的描述)

capture拍摄,录制(熟词生义),从俘获,捕获;夺取等含义而来,此处更加贴切。

参考译文:

去年春天,在黄石公园,我沿着一条小路穿过一片黑暗的森林。当我终于走出树林时,眼前的景色令人叹为观止。一只鹰飞过雪山,雪山倒映在下面平静的湖面上。当我专注于拍摄这个惊人的场景时,我突然有一种被监视的感觉。相机仍然对着我的眼睛,我转过身来,呆住了。离我只有几米远的地方有一头熊。水从它浓密的棕色毛发上落下,熊回头盯着我。时间静止了,我和熊都在等着看谁先行动。我的腿开始发抖。不知怎的,我强迫我的手指按下按钮。一秒钟后,熊转身跑回了森林。当我从震惊中恢复过来时,我看了看我的相机。我最可怕但又神奇的经历现在被永远地记录在一张照片里。

描写景物读后感的写作方法和步骤(读后续写素材积累)(3)

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